In this article
- How to listen starts with being available honestly
- Let the first explanation finish
- Ask questions that leave room for an unexpected answer
- A hypothetical one-to-one conversation
- Respond to the concern before explaining yourself
- End without closing down the person
- Make your listening visible afterwards
- Do not turn listening into a performance
Harvard Business Review recommends clarifying before answering. This guide focuses on the conversational habits that keep an employee’s explanation open.
How to listen starts with being available honestly
If you cannot give attention, say so and offer a realistic alternative. “I can listen properly at three” is more respectful than half-listening while replying to messages.
For an urgent concern, first ask whether immediate action is needed. A safety issue or serious report should not wait simply because you planned a later conversation.
Choose a setting appropriate to the information. A public corridor is not a good place for a sensitive work concern.
Agree the time available. A clear boundary lets both people use the conversation well and reduces the chance of an abrupt ending.
Let the first explanation finish
Resist completing the speaker’s sentence or answering a question they have not yet asked. Your familiarity with similar problems does not mean you understand this one.
Notice when you begin preparing your response. Bring attention back to the words being spoken and the point still being developed.
Use brief acknowledgements without taking over: “I follow,” or “Go on.” Do not fill every pause.
A pause may mean the speaker is thinking, choosing words or deciding how much detail is relevant. Ask whether they want a moment rather than interpreting the silence for them.
If the explanation becomes very long, summarise respectfully and ask what the central question is. Listening can have structure without becoming interruption.
Ask questions that leave room for an unexpected answer
Use open questions about the work: “What is making that difficult?” “What changed?” “What do you need me to understand?”
Avoid a sequence that steers towards your existing conclusion. “Is the real problem that you did not plan?” sounds like a verdict, even with a question mark.
Ask one question and listen to the answer. Several questions at once can make the colleague feel tested and leave important details unexplored.
When you have an interpretation, label it as provisional: “I may be misunderstanding, but it sounds as if the approval step is unclear.”
Invite correction. The correction is evidence that the conversation is becoming more accurate, not evidence that your listening failed.
A hypothetical one-to-one conversation
Imagine a colleague says she is struggling with a senior stakeholder. The manager immediately offers advice on confidence.
The colleague becomes quieter because confidence was not the issue. The stakeholder has been changing instructions through separate channels.
In a second attempt, the manager asks what happened and lets her describe the sequence. He summarises the conflicting instructions and asks which decision needs clarification.
They agree that the manager will help establish one approval route. The colleague owns preparing the examples of changed instructions.
This hypothetical illustrates the cost of answering too soon. It does not establish that every hesitant employee has a hidden process problem.
Respond to the concern before explaining yourself
When the concern involves your behaviour, acknowledge the point before defending your intention.
Try: “You are saying that my late changes left you unclear about which version to use. I understand the issue.”
Then ask what happened and what consequence followed. You can explain your reasons after you understand the effect.
Avoid turning the conversation into a request for reassurance. “You know I only want the best for you” asks the employee to manage your image.
If the concern is inaccurate, check the facts respectfully. The aim is a shared understanding, not automatic agreement.
End without closing down the person
A useful close distinguishes what you heard, what is decided and what remains unresolved. Ask whether there is an important point you missed.
If action is needed, name the owner and timing. If no action is possible, explain why rather than allowing silence to imply a promise.
Do not promise secrecy beyond your role. For serious concerns, explain the appropriate reporting route and the limits of confidentiality.
If time runs out, arrange a continuation and name the unfinished point. “We still need to discuss the workload change; let us return to it tomorrow morning” shows that the issue has not disappeared.
Make your listening visible afterwards
Follow through on agreed actions. If the plan changes, update the colleague. Attention during the conversation loses value when nothing happens afterwards.
You can also ask whether your summary was accurate once the person has had time to reflect. Some people think more clearly after writing or reviewing the discussion.
Peak Belt’s clear-communication guide and difficult-conversation guide offer related practice. Find more in TrueNorth.
Do not turn listening into a performance
Repeatedly naming the technique can distract from the colleague's concern. You do not need to announce that you are practising empathy or active listening. Use plain questions, allow correction and keep attention on the issue. If you summarise inaccurately, acknowledge it and try again. The goal is a better understanding, rather than looking like a skilled listener.
For your next suitable one-to-one, choose one habit: let the first explanation finish. Notice what you learn that your first answer would have missed.
AI-assisted researched guidance from PeakBelt. Hypothetical examples are labelled in the text. See our editorial approach.